Definition of a Judaizer:
One who teaches “Unless you are circumcised according to the custom of Moses, you cannot be saved.” (see Acts 15)
The entire epistle of Galatians focuses on Paul’s defense of his ministry in the face of accusations from Judaizers who had infiltrated the early church and was deceiving people into thinking that obedience to the Law was necessary for salvation. We often think that the Judaizers were just a problem in the first-century, but in reality we have a very close form of it among us today. Thanks to the spread of higher-life theology, which teaches that Christians are saved in a “carnal Christian” state and then must break through to a “deeper” or “higher” life to truly be among the Christian elite (a view I believe to be false doctrine at best and quite possibly heretical) -- many choose forms of strict law-keeping as a means to that deeper, better Christian life.
Most Judaizer teachers today don’t come right out and directly say that one must follow the Law of Moses for salvation. On the strictest technical definition, then, a true Judaizer may be a rare thing in the church. But I still choose to use this definition because of the prevalence of the higher-life law-keeping in some churches and denominations today. And for many, circumcision does end up coming back as something to do out of obedience. Most don’t say that circumcision is necessary for salvation, but they do say that it is necessary for true obedience; for breaking through to that higher life. Consider Bill Gothard, whose Institute in Basic Life Principles is well-respected in many fundamentalist circles. His organization centers around deducing “basic principles” from various verses or passages in Scripture, many taken out of context, and turning them into rules to live by if someone wants to truly be in the “in crowd” with God.
Paul clearly says that “if you accept circumcision, Christ will be of no advantage to you.” (Galatians 5:2) and the New Testament is clear that physical external circumcision was merely a sign which has passed away in significance due to “circumcision” instead being a matter of the heart. Those of us in the Reformed tradition believe that the sign of baptism now corresponds to the sign of circumcision in the Old Testament. However, Gothard takes a near-opposite position by instead having released booklets and brochures emphasizing the need for circumcision today! He even goes beyond just suggesting medical benefits, which are disputable, but to go so far as to instruct parents in the “benefits of circumcision on the 8th day”, and to hold a circumcision ceremony! Furthermore, he says that “because this is one subject which is so strongly commanded and reinforced in Scripture, there is no question what the decision of Christian parents should be on this matter.”
If this were not enough proof of the matter that Bill Gothard and the Institute in Basic Life Principles treads dangerously close to the camp of the Judaizers, it should also be added that this is not the only element of the Mosaic Law which has been reworked by Gothard and his camp to become “non-optional principles” which Christians must follow. Close adherents of Gothard’s program also tend to abstain from eating “unclean” meats such as pork and hold to other similar dietary restrictions. Gothard has also published “sexual rules” for married couples -- based on Leviticus -- in his “Advanced Seminar Textbook”. Couples who adhere to these regulations believe that in doing so they will be bringing a blessing upon them and their offspring. Gothard refers these points from the law (which go even beyond the Law with additional rules) as “God’s hidden design” and now that Gothard himself has revealed these things, making them no longer hidden, it is the responsibility of Christians to heed and obey.
Another issue at hand is that Gothard, etc. do not simply say that the whole law must be obeyed -- the moral, ceremonial, and civic laws -- but rather pick and choose certain laws to impose (and even go beyond). But also in Galatians, addressing this same sort of situation, Paul wrote that “I testify again to every man who accepts circumcision that he is obligated to keep the whole law.” (Galatians 5:3) Gothard, etc. are not advocating keeping the whole law, but rather have adopted a Pharasaical position, choosing specific laws to keep as well as adding some more (and attaching blessings to them). Scripture does not contain blessings for obeying some of the law; the blessing is for wholeheartedly keeping the Law. We cannot do this, nor are we called to do this, for Christ has done so on our behalf. (See Rom. 10:4) From a Scriptural standpoint, if someone wants to accept circumcision (or parents choose circumcision for their sons for spiritual reasons) they are in effect rejecting the completed work of Christ. Remember again Galatians 5:2-4 -- “Look: I, Paul, say to you that if you accept circumcision, Christ will be of no advantage to you. I testify again to every man who accepts circumcision that he is obligated to keep the whole law. You are severed from Christ, you who would be justified by the law; you have fallen away from grace.”
This is not simply a matter of denominational preference or interpretation of Scripture. This is the Gospel at stake in this matter. This is a case of a leader, author, and mentor to many individuals (whether directly or indirectly) who is teaching another gospel, a gospel that is at best “Christ plus circumcision” or “Christ plus the law”, and in reality is no gospel at all. Any “gospel” that requires Christ plus something else has ceased to be gospel at all. This is a case of placing trust in the flesh rather than in God. It is a case of believing in something other than the completed work of Jesus Christ in order to be blessed by God. Friends, this isn’t even Christianity anymore. Even if central truths of the Gospel are adhered to, by re-introducing Old Covenant signs they effectively reject all of the New Covenant -- including the finished work of Christ. In fact, I will go so far as to question whether those who seriously advocate righteousness through lawkeeping rather than righteousness in Christ alone, who teach circumcision as a means of earning blessings, who call unclean what God has declared clean (Acts 10:9-15) -- whether they are regenerate in the first place. These may very well be “wolves in sheep’s clothing.” The Holy Spirit will not direct someone to directly violate the very words of Scripture and teach another gospel. If not from God, then where else can this be from?
Galatians 2:21 - 3:3: “I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness were through the law, then Christ died for no purpose. O foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you? It was before your eyes that Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified. Let me ask you only this: Did you receive the Spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?”
I urge the reader to realize that this is no small matter. Anyone who would teach circumcision as a requirement for blessing, or encourage parents to choose to subject their sons to the rite of circumcision rather than the New Covenant sign of baptism, is guilty of rejecting the Gospel and replacing it with a false gospel that is no gospel at all.
Galatians 5:6-9 - “...In Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision counts for anything, but only faith working through love. You were running well. Who hindered you from obeying the truth? This persuasion is not from him who calls you. A little leaven leavens the whole lump.”
One of the pastors in our area (and within my denomination) tells of a diagram with three circles, with an outer circle, middle circle, and inner circle. The inner circle contains the core issues of salvation. The second circle contains denominational differences, etc. -- things that are still important, but are up to interpretation and are open to legitimate disagreement. The third circle contains peripheral items in the preference and individual conviction category. Problems arise when people try to move something to a different circle than it belongs -- for example, educational decisions such as homeschooling from the third circle to the second circle, or interpretations such as specific mode of baptism to the first circle. In the case of true legalism (not just various lifestyle choices, but an actual return to the Law, such as the circumcision issue) it’s a serious matter of putting something new inside that first circle -- the core matters of the faith. These are the types of things that consist of adding to, or taking away from, the Gospel.
Brothers and sisters who read this, if you are in a position where you are being influenced by such modern-day Judaizing, strongly consider whether this influence can be a positive thing in any way. As a little leaven leavens the whole lump, this false gospel of legalism in all likelihood permeates throughout the theology you are being exposed to and influenced by. Remember that the gospel plus anything else ceases to be the gospel at all. If you are in an environment where in addition to the gospel, other things such as circumcision, dietary laws, marital abstinence laws, etc. are being enforced on a level equal to the gospel, where you must comply in order to be regarded as a fellow believer, or where you must comply in order to be regarded as truly obedient, and you are not in a position to be a bright light in a place of spiritual darkness, then flee. There are many matters of denominational differences, lifestyle preferences, worship style preferences, church cultures, etc. that can be overcome for the sake of Christian unity and are not things worth fighting for. But the Gospel is not one of these things. It is so much at the core that if someone seeks to deny the gospel, or add to it (in effect denying its sufficiency) then one cannot stand by and permit it. Can you teach the true gospel and be used to draw people to Christ? If so then you may be placed there for a purpose. If the greater risk is that you will be influenced by the false gospel so that you begin to doubt the true Gospel, then the wise decision would be to flee the false teaching and any place, institution, church, or other group in which that false teaching is being promoted. “A little leaven leavens the whole lump.”
Galatians 1:6-8 - “I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting him who called you in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel— not that there is another one, but there are some who trouble you and want to distort the gospel of Christ. But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach to you a gospel contrary to the one we preached to you, let him be accursed. As we have said before, so now I say again: If anyone is preaching to you a gospel contrary to the one you received, let him be accursed.”
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
This morning I uploaded a new "note" to my Facebook profile detailing more specific information behind the upcoming Walthill Kids Day in the Park. There are a few reasons why I shouldn't post it here in an entirely public location, so if you are not able to see my notes on Facebook but want to read it, email me for a copy.
Friday, July 10, 2009
This is pretty cool for those of us who are broadcast enthusiasts etc. Last night I was driving around in Lincoln listening to a 99 watt low-power FM on 94.5 when for about three seconds the local station cut out and instead I was picking up a station from Richmond, Virginia due to atmospheric E-skip. I have a digital radio in my car (receives digital radio signals and displays identification/informative text about the station being received, if the station is digital). Instead of the "MYBRIDGE" identifier on the radio's screen, when the signal cut over to modern pop the screen read "WRVQ-FM Q94". A Google search revealed this is a 200,000 watt (superpower) FM station in Richmond! After a couple more seconds the radio cut back to the local signal and "MYBRIDGE" again appeared on the display.
Monday, July 06, 2009
More thoughts on sovereignty
*continuing the theme from this post.
I'm a staunch five-point Calvinist. I believe strongly in the sovereignty of God. I believe that God is not surprised by anything that we do or that happens to us, and that what does happen is part of his plan for our lives.
That said, sometimes that's not easy to remember. There are times when it's easy to see God's hand in everything and be reminded he's in control. Then there are times when his hand is still evident but it goes against what seems right to us, in our understanding or lack thereof. And of course there are times when it seems like everything is out of control.
Right now I'm somewhere between the 2nd and 3rd option. If I didn't believe God to be sovereign over all, things wouldn't be very easy to get through right now. Just a lot of uncertainty when I feel much more comfortable with order. I'd like to have everything planned out, be able to progress along with that plan, and have everything just work out. I'd like to have life decisions and timing go according to a plan too, and know that everything is all going to turn out great.
But instead it often turns out that just as soon as things start to come together, something unravels. Some new unexpected thing comes up and my goal or plan starts to look impossible. Maybe whatever was unexpected was actually helped along by my own actions. Whatever it may be, it becomes clear that the original plan isn't going to work as I thought.
Then there are times when things go entirely out of control. All at once, one project needs emergency planning. Clients are needing urgent changes. Deadlines are approaching. Other items on the calendar are moving around. Then what's to be done?
Will we start to doubt whether God has it all under control? Will we question whether he is really paying attention? Will we question if he really knows best? There's no denying that as humans we start to wonder some of those things at times. But if we really believe in God's sovereignty, we have to instead realize that yes, he is in control.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
(Isaiah 55:8-9 ESV)
And thus what seems to be something fully out of control is really just a different plan that will, in retrospect, be clear that it was fully orchestrated by God for his purposes.
“Lift up your eyes on high and see: who created these? He who brings out their host by number, calling them all by name, by the greatness of his might, and because he is strong in power not one is missing.
Why do you say, O Jacob, and speak, O Israel, “My way is hidden from the LORD, and my right is disregarded by my God”? Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable.”
(Isaiah 40:26-28 ESV)
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Waiting and Sovereignty
Why is it so hard to really believe God is sovereign in every area of life? It’s easy to talk about him being in total control of everything, but to actually put belief into practice seems to be another story altogether.
Scripture is clear... take Jeremiah 29:11 for example (“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD...”)... God has planned out each one of our lives and knows each moment.
Patience is one of the products (“fruit”) of a relationship with the Holy Spirit. (Gal. 5:22) Numerous references in Scripture speak of “wait[ing] for the Lord”. We are also commanded to be patient... and if we really believe in God’s sovereignty, patience should come as a result because he knows the future and has it all put together. So why is it so hard to actually be patient and wait for what God intends to do? Why the need to try to take charge? I know these things... I even seem to be frequently in a position of needing to tell them to others. So the question I have to ask myself is if I know these things, why am I not living with the belief that God really has everything under control... rather than always trying to impatiently move everything along according to my own timetable? Why is it so hard to wait for the promises to come true?
Although we live in a culture that teaches us to expect to get whatever we want right when we want it, Scripture is full of examples of delayed promises -- but promises nonetheless. Consider Abraham, who was promised to be a father of many nations despite having no children of his own and already being advanced in years. Numerous times he acted based on his own reason to try to help the promises along, but despite his failings God delivered -- in his timing, not Abraham’s. Some of the covenantal promises were not fulfilled until the coming of Christ -- over two millennia later! Many times we quote Philippians 1:6 as reassurance to those who are struggling with God’s sovereign plan for their lives. The promise of Philippians 1:6 is true -- “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” -- but notice that the completion of the good work isn’t an immediate thing but rather at the day of Jesus Christ! Yes, God will always keep his promises -- we can rest assured of his sovereign plan -- but the timing of it is not according to our impatience but rather in his wisdom.
Scripture is clear... take Jeremiah 29:11 for example (“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD...”)... God has planned out each one of our lives and knows each moment.
Patience is one of the products (“fruit”) of a relationship with the Holy Spirit. (Gal. 5:22) Numerous references in Scripture speak of “wait[ing] for the Lord”. We are also commanded to be patient... and if we really believe in God’s sovereignty, patience should come as a result because he knows the future and has it all put together. So why is it so hard to actually be patient and wait for what God intends to do? Why the need to try to take charge? I know these things... I even seem to be frequently in a position of needing to tell them to others. So the question I have to ask myself is if I know these things, why am I not living with the belief that God really has everything under control... rather than always trying to impatiently move everything along according to my own timetable? Why is it so hard to wait for the promises to come true?
Although we live in a culture that teaches us to expect to get whatever we want right when we want it, Scripture is full of examples of delayed promises -- but promises nonetheless. Consider Abraham, who was promised to be a father of many nations despite having no children of his own and already being advanced in years. Numerous times he acted based on his own reason to try to help the promises along, but despite his failings God delivered -- in his timing, not Abraham’s. Some of the covenantal promises were not fulfilled until the coming of Christ -- over two millennia later! Many times we quote Philippians 1:6 as reassurance to those who are struggling with God’s sovereign plan for their lives. The promise of Philippians 1:6 is true -- “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” -- but notice that the completion of the good work isn’t an immediate thing but rather at the day of Jesus Christ! Yes, God will always keep his promises -- we can rest assured of his sovereign plan -- but the timing of it is not according to our impatience but rather in his wisdom.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Culture and Relationships
I want to cover a topic I haven’t previously discussed on my blog, but have been thinking about recently and decided to organize some thoughts in a post. The basic gist of what I want to cover is “dating and relationships” and comes about due to thinking about what our culture is teaching people (especially kids and teens but also adults to an extent as well) about what is normal and acceptable in relationships with one another. I haven’t approached this topic before, mainly because of the amount of division surrounding this topic -- and that I am a single person attempting to write about things I may not have first-hand experience in. Nonetheless I have a few things I wanted to share, for the purpose of sorting through my own thoughts and ideas and in hopes that maybe something will be relevant or helpful to anyone else asking similar questions.
PART ONE: THE CAUSES AND SYMPTOMS
I think most would agree that our culture has some serious problems in the area of romantic relationships. For example, how easy of a task would it be to find a few mainstream, commercial movies that demonstrate a healthy view of this topic -- without perversions that are presented as something positive or normal? Chances are this would be a difficult task.
But if numerous people were asked what constitutes a demonstration of a healthy view of relationships, it would be a solid bet that all or most responses would be considerably different -- even among Christians. Now I am a firm believer in Christian liberty, and therefore am not going to say that one interpretation or standard is superior to another. To attempt to present principles as law and pit one view against another would in all likelihood be firmly in the camp of legalism and would be wrong. I would then be guilty of the very thing I’ve spent a significant amount of space in past years arguing against. What I will do is simply ask the reader to evaluate for himself or herself what a healthy depiction of a relationship is, and as a matter of conscience determine what is acceptable and is not. If someone has made this evaluation for themselves, it is not for another to judge. But if one is accepting of anything the culture offers for entertainment, without questioning whether it is really right or wrong, that is often a warning sign.
Why am I making a point of this? Why does it matter? Because relationships are a popular topic in our popular culture, and thus it is impossible to participate in these forms of culture without quickly coming across popular depictions. Sometimes negative things are presented in a negative light, but usually what is immoral is depicted as something positive because of it being “fun”.
For example, just to pick on a few areas...
1. Listen to certain popular hip-hop songs and you’ll get the impression that normalcy involves getting your “b*tch” or “sh*wty” and going down to a nightclub, acting loose, and participating in “lovemaking”. Is that really a normal relationship?
One of the underlying causes seems to be a loss of respect. There’s a loss of respect for men, to be certain, in this cultural snapshot -- but what has really suffered here is a respect for the female gender. This is evident in the thought that a woman is simply a “thing” a guy can use for his own pleasure and the corresponding demeaning language that robs another person of dignity. Thus a lack of respect, to the point of resorting to demeaning acts that are both physical and verbal in nature, is foundational to this becoming “normal” to our culture.
2. Watch TV shows and movies intended for teenagers and you’ll get the impression that normalcy involves giggling over glances made around school lockers, and that who invites whom to dances and proms is a make-or-break decision affecting all of life ahead. Gossip and “flavor of the day” relationships reign supreme. Is that really normal in the real world?
Sometime in the last couple of generations, the teenager began to emerge as a distinct social group. No longer a transitional period between childhood and adulthood, where immature things of childhood fade away as the individual becomes more mature and prepares for the real world; now the teen and pre-teen years instead have become the real world. Teens today have a culture that wants the respect of being part of adult society without first earning that right by reaching maturity and acquiring life experiences as part of that process. There’s no need to grow and mature if a “fun” caricature of reality can be had right away, with flashier packaging than the real thing. However, adulthood involves maturity and, like it or not, high schoolers aren’t yet prepared to handle all adult decisions. In the area of romance, for example, the average high schooler just isn’t ready yet for the many facets of investing in another person. Sure, the feelings might be there. The fun experiences can be there. But there’s still a good deal of immaturity involved too. Except in rare cases, this is not building a foundation for a healthy relationship at a later time.
3. Pay attention to entertainment targeted at an adult female audience (i.e. “chick flicks " and novels) and you’ll get the idea that men simply exist for the purpose of completing a woman’s life and if a man is failing to do that, he can simply be ditched for something more exciting, traded in for an upgrade, etc. The culture says that it’s okay if you’re not that into him, or “he’s just not that into you” -- move on to the next greatest thing. Try-before-you-buy and If-you-don’t-like-it-take-it-back are the catchphrases of the day. But is that really supposed to be the norm?
4. Read magazines intended for men and you’ll get the impression that it’s both normal and acceptable to look at someone who isn’t your wife if it makes you happy. Whatever brings happiness and satisfaction is seen as being the goal. Is that really what normal is supposed to be?
Divorce rates in the church are at a high, and the rate is considered to be as high among professing Christians as among those who do not profess to be Christians. With there being virtually no difference in this area, it seems it would be a fair assessment to say the church has on a fairly large magnitude simply adopted the culture’s values in this area. Rather than influencing the culture, Christians have been influenced by the culture. Respect for one another deteriorates so that abuses happen, commitment is lost, and marriage partners begin to be viewed as parasites on the body rather than truly one body, one flesh. Discontentment lies around every corner and thoughts of fleeing to a better option are entertained as legitimate possibilities. An “entertainment” view of love takes over in place of a devoted, sacrificial, caring love, so that when the honeymoon high wears off, the temptation creeps in to move on to another relationship so as to experience that honeymoon high again. Love becomes reduced to just that high feeling, so that when the high is gone then love is said to be gone too. If this is the lie we are believing, then is it any wonder that disrespect, pleasure-seeking, and lack of commitment have become the norms in our society?
A common thread in all four examples seems to be “fun”. Our culture seems to have accepted the belief that the pursuit of happiness is supreme, and as long as the goal is to have fun, then it doesn’t matter what happens along the way. We seem to have forgotten to live for anything more than the present and however the present feels. The past’s mistakes are not learned from, and the future is disregarded as irrelevant.
Thus actually wanting a relationship of mutual involvement in each others’ lives often takes a back seat to the fun, thrills, and feelings. Outgoing, charismatic, fun, thrill-seeking people -- the kind you see in movies -- become hot commodities. But when the fun wears off, gone too is the desire to continue, and a breakup or divorce becomes the next step.
What has happened to the aspect of commitment and active involvement in each other? A few theories exist as a response. One is that social pressures to date at an early age (especially in high school culture) require a fast decision for the sole purpose of landing someone so as to be able to change status on Facebook and go to the prom. The other person isn’t as important as having ones own status among peers emphasized. Being in a relationship is essentially required to avoid being an outcast. Another theory is related to the high school theory but affects adults -- in some situations and social circles, a single person is seen as less legitimate than a married person. A single person may feel the need to make a quick decision and enter a relationship with the intent of marriage so as to be in a better position to make advancements on the social ladder. Their union is not based on each other as much as it’s based on getting ahead of everyone else in the world. When things get tough, there may not be enough there to hold them together. Yet another theory involves the entertainment factor: books, music, and movies paint an attractive picture of a particular ideal, and decisions are made based on those ideals -- ideals which often are as shallow as looks and material goods. If shallow to begin with, when the material goods are gone and the looks change, there may be little else to keep the relationship alive. These are but some of the possible reasons why, as the value of each individual has been cheapened, breakups and divorce rates remain at a high rate.
PART TWO: FINDING WHAT’S RIGHT
I think if a survey were to be taken of what people want in a relationship or a marriage, a high number of responses would include some allusion to a “fairy tale”. Certainly we could expect a significant number of such responses among the female demographic, but I think a high amount of guys would admit to the same. What is it about the “fairy tale” that appeals to so many?
Perhaps it’s the “happily ever after” component. In an age where, on average, five out of ten marriages will be dissolved, the picture of a commitment that lasts for life is a very desirable alternative, even if it may seem unreal today. In a depraved and fallen world, this picture of what’s right still appeals to many of us.
Or perhaps it’s how everything seems to fall together just right... the worst predicaments end up being just what was needed to get two people to meet each other and fall in love. I’ll get back to this later, but this is also a truth -- even if we can’t see it at the time -- because this also reflects God’s sovereignty. We can rest assured that his plan will be worked out because he is in control.
Another aspect common to many romantic fairy tales is the great deal of respect each individual has for each other. You don’t hear people in fairy tales talking about “clubbing with their ‘b*tch’” or “losing a [dud] guy in ten days”. Instead we see classic chivalry, courteous behavior from a deference and respect for one another (sometimes almost to an extreme where the guys are overly strong and the gals are overly needy, but still in a healthy way). This, too, appeals to us because it fills a void that we know we rarely ever see around us. Even someone who has not been regenerated and made aware of the truth still often expresses this longing for something better as a result of common grace.
All too often, however, even this classic depiction becomes tainted by depravity and deception. What appeals to us ceases to be the pictures of truth -- the way it should be in the created order -- and instead becomes the surface things. Looks, appeal, and actions replace commitment, sovereign order, and sacrificial devotion. Before long, these become the main things we think about in fairy tale stories. Guys often forget the examples given of being a strong man to defend, protect, and sacrifice for the lady and instead just want to get her and be with her. Ladies often forget that the prince is a prince because he is the king’s son and is reflecting the character of his father and the mission he has been sent on (think about that!) and not the prince because he’s enjoyable to look at. The looks and charm become what’s remembered and focused on, (so that it can be easy to instead fall for an impostor who has the looks but isn’t the right one) rather than the prince’s character, commitment, and dedication to doing what he needs to do as a heir and representative of his father’s kingdom.
PART THREE: WHERE TO GO FROM HERE
Where things get harder is when it comes to putting ideas, illustrations, and proven truths into actual practice. Relationships and marriage aren’t things you can create 1-2-3 step programs for. You can’t scientifically measure it and then create formulas for getting the desired results. You can’t even follow certain principles and get people to respond in a certain way (listen up and get rid of the books that supposedly help). In fact, sometimes you just have to step out, take a risk, and be willing to accept what happens -- always remaining true to your convictions, keeping a level head, and seeking God’s will. A potential pitfall is when something starts to seem to be not right and due to pressure -- whether social, emotional, etc. -- these concerns are suppressed.
But what if concerns are suppressed and someone still proceeds into a painful situation that seems to have been a wrong choice? Is it then too late? Has God’s plan been destroyed? First, if we really believe in God’s sovereignty, we have to also agree that God’s plan can not be ruined. What we do is still known by him and while we can cause unnecessary pain to ourselves and others, we can’t foil his intentions. If we could, then who would really be the sovereign one?! So it’s hard for me to really say with certainty that a wrong choice has really caused a major, life-altering problem. Certainly, God does not will for us to sin. If we make a sinful choice, we have definitely violated God’s decree. But when we get into a painful situation and seem to be sidetracked from where we should be, it may be that this situation was still really part of God’s design because it provided a necessary experience to help the individual grow. The hurt provided a learning experience that points to the direction to something better, or perhaps to give an insight that will be used to build up another person.
It would be a lot easier if we could just protect ourselves and those around us from anything that causes any hurt. In many homeschooling and family-centric organizations, parent-orchestrated courtship (basically betrothal, and pretty close to arranged marriages) are presented as the only way to go. In a “father knows best” sort of situation, anyone unmarried (whether 18 or 38 years old) must yield to the parents‘ desires and let them approve and in some cases even establish the relationship; where without approval it can’t happen at all. How do I know this? I used to believe it and live surrounded by it. One of the main reasons is to protect others from making the same mistakes and experiencing the same things they themselves have. We often think that if we’ve had something unpleasant happen, we have learned from it and then can prevent others from doing the same thing so that they don’t go through it at all. But as noble as it sounds -- and while I detest the legalistic rules that comes from these viewpoints and the completely unnatural, contrived and regulated approach to relationships that these groups present -- I can see where they’re coming from, and the intent really is for a good reason. The intent doesn’t justify the means or the end, but we can still see where it comes from. When it does really get out of hand and the intent as well isn’t all that noble is when it’s orchestrated simply as a means of control -- not for protection -- such as for executing a “vision-casted” two hundred year plan, or a means of trying to control what one’s children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, etc. will accomplish in order to see one’s own goals come true. However, I’ll avoid going further into criticism of this as it would distract from the intent of this particular post.
Back on the main topic, it’s only by trusting in God’s will -- that unpleasant things are part of a better plan and something greater that hasn’t yet been made clear -- that we can still be content even in disappointment. His plan didn’t just get thwarted by some wrong choice or dumb decision. Our goal did, but if it wasn’t the right goal it needed to be terminated anyway.
Finally, what are some things we can do in order to remain focused on the truth in the face of the distortion, deception, and perversion our culture throws at us?
The first thing I would suggest to the reader is to ensure you know what you believe as far as right and wrong, make sure that it is a sound view in line with the Bible, and do not give in to letting your guard down. When something is wrong, don’t continue even if all the social pressure around you is screaming in your ear to give in. The saying is true that “what is popular is not always right; what is right is not always popular.”
Second, if you are looking for a long-term committed relationship -- a good goal, as an intention of something short-term has already resulted in commitment being thrown to the wind -- think through ramifications and what things are requirements for the person you are considering a relationship with. A few years ago, singer-songwriter Derek Webb would often sing the song “Dance”, which he had written earlier during his time with Caedmon’s Call. The song was written about his grandmother, who at past 90 years old had been proposed to by a good friend of hers who was a resident in the same nursing home. However, she was quick to say she turned him down right away... because he couldn’t dance! Derek Webb would go on to explain at the concerts that “for all you young ladies out there”, this was a good reason to have a list of non-optionals and turn away any guy that didn’t meet the list! Now I’d add a couple things to this humorous illustration. First, it’s not just for women but applies to guys as well. Second, dancing probably isn’t really a good non-optional unless dancing is central to your calling so that having a partner who couldn’t dance would really be too much of a point of contention. But to be serious about this, it really is good advice. Some thoughts to consider...
1. Know your calling! If you are called to do something or be something, and another person simply does not share that same value (or is even opposed to it), there’s a good chance this relationship would be a bad idea. Though it’s certainly possible that God will bring the other person around so they share the same goal, it’s at least a cause for concern. The difference in goals can at minimum become a point of contention, and potentially become so great that you might be tempted to throw aside the goal for the sake of peace and unity. For example, if you are called to serve people, then someone who doesn’t particularly like people isn’t a good fit. If you’re passionate about missions, then someone who doesn’t appreciate any culture but his or her own isn’t a good fit.
2. Decide which things you simply cannot compromise without violating your conscience and beliefs. For Christians, theology can and should be a big one. If you aren’t on the same page in what you believe, what is going to happen when you must make a decision based on what you believe the Bible teaches? For example, when you have kids, what happens if you are in disagreement on whether to baptize your children into the covenant fellowship or have them remain as an outsider until they have their own profession of faith? Denominational differences -- ways people interpret Scripture -- really can be a bigger deal than most will readily admit.
3. See the whole person. Usually when people talk about non-optional goals for a relationship, it focuses on things like charisma, appeal, looks, common interests, etc. But what about character? Someone who you can have great discussions with, enjoy being around, etc. but has no sense of commitment so might leave (emotionally or actually) as soon as someone more exciting becomes available simply isn’t a good fit. You can certainly remain friends, but I would be extremely cautious about ever pursuing a deeper relationship with that person unless they undergo some serious changes. And unless that other person does undergo some serious changes, they may never want to even be around you again -- even just to be friends -- because of the entertainment-values-based thrill-seeking nature. (Little known fact: I know this from experience.) Or someone who is “good on the eyes” might meet everything on an “externals checklist” (something I really don’t recommend) but actually share few common interests, have different goals, and simply not be compatible. So to want a relationship with someone just based on their physical appearance really is to also invite disaster. To shun someone just because they don’t match up in the appearance department is also not right. This deception may be one of the biggest lies of our culture that we unknowingly believe and use as a filter. So much for the Hollywood ideal!
At the same time, realize that God isn't done working on any of us -- and in time, flaws that are roadblocks now may be things of the past later on.
Third, consider which influences may be detrimental due to unwholesome ideas being presented as the right thing. Forms of entertainment which cause unrealistic or unhealthy expectations, stir up feelings of discontent, make light of inappropriate behavior, etc. should be avoided. Some general advice that is “80% right 70% of the time for 60% of the population” (just kidding; I think it really is a good thing to keep in mind) is to engage culture when truth is present or when your involvement can be used to change the culture for good. Avoid involvement with the culture in areas where you can make no difference but it can change you. This will vary for each person, but if you being to be shaped by it rather than shaping it yourself, it may become a serious problem.
Fourth and finally, remember that no amount of scientific modeling, prescribing, or planning will guarantee a particular result. You can’t put God in a box, and neither can you try to make him direct in a certain way. His leading may be a huge surprise, but when he is ready to reveal it, he will do so. Then you can look back at the past and see how all the different twists and turns and roadblocks actually did serve a purpose and weren’t for no reason at all. Then give God the glory for what he has done.
PART ONE: THE CAUSES AND SYMPTOMS
I think most would agree that our culture has some serious problems in the area of romantic relationships. For example, how easy of a task would it be to find a few mainstream, commercial movies that demonstrate a healthy view of this topic -- without perversions that are presented as something positive or normal? Chances are this would be a difficult task.
But if numerous people were asked what constitutes a demonstration of a healthy view of relationships, it would be a solid bet that all or most responses would be considerably different -- even among Christians. Now I am a firm believer in Christian liberty, and therefore am not going to say that one interpretation or standard is superior to another. To attempt to present principles as law and pit one view against another would in all likelihood be firmly in the camp of legalism and would be wrong. I would then be guilty of the very thing I’ve spent a significant amount of space in past years arguing against. What I will do is simply ask the reader to evaluate for himself or herself what a healthy depiction of a relationship is, and as a matter of conscience determine what is acceptable and is not. If someone has made this evaluation for themselves, it is not for another to judge. But if one is accepting of anything the culture offers for entertainment, without questioning whether it is really right or wrong, that is often a warning sign.
Why am I making a point of this? Why does it matter? Because relationships are a popular topic in our popular culture, and thus it is impossible to participate in these forms of culture without quickly coming across popular depictions. Sometimes negative things are presented in a negative light, but usually what is immoral is depicted as something positive because of it being “fun”.
For example, just to pick on a few areas...
1. Listen to certain popular hip-hop songs and you’ll get the impression that normalcy involves getting your “b*tch” or “sh*wty” and going down to a nightclub, acting loose, and participating in “lovemaking”. Is that really a normal relationship?
One of the underlying causes seems to be a loss of respect. There’s a loss of respect for men, to be certain, in this cultural snapshot -- but what has really suffered here is a respect for the female gender. This is evident in the thought that a woman is simply a “thing” a guy can use for his own pleasure and the corresponding demeaning language that robs another person of dignity. Thus a lack of respect, to the point of resorting to demeaning acts that are both physical and verbal in nature, is foundational to this becoming “normal” to our culture.
2. Watch TV shows and movies intended for teenagers and you’ll get the impression that normalcy involves giggling over glances made around school lockers, and that who invites whom to dances and proms is a make-or-break decision affecting all of life ahead. Gossip and “flavor of the day” relationships reign supreme. Is that really normal in the real world?
Sometime in the last couple of generations, the teenager began to emerge as a distinct social group. No longer a transitional period between childhood and adulthood, where immature things of childhood fade away as the individual becomes more mature and prepares for the real world; now the teen and pre-teen years instead have become the real world. Teens today have a culture that wants the respect of being part of adult society without first earning that right by reaching maturity and acquiring life experiences as part of that process. There’s no need to grow and mature if a “fun” caricature of reality can be had right away, with flashier packaging than the real thing. However, adulthood involves maturity and, like it or not, high schoolers aren’t yet prepared to handle all adult decisions. In the area of romance, for example, the average high schooler just isn’t ready yet for the many facets of investing in another person. Sure, the feelings might be there. The fun experiences can be there. But there’s still a good deal of immaturity involved too. Except in rare cases, this is not building a foundation for a healthy relationship at a later time.
3. Pay attention to entertainment targeted at an adult female audience (i.e. “chick flicks " and novels) and you’ll get the idea that men simply exist for the purpose of completing a woman’s life and if a man is failing to do that, he can simply be ditched for something more exciting, traded in for an upgrade, etc. The culture says that it’s okay if you’re not that into him, or “he’s just not that into you” -- move on to the next greatest thing. Try-before-you-buy and If-you-don’t-like-it-take-it-back are the catchphrases of the day. But is that really supposed to be the norm?
4. Read magazines intended for men and you’ll get the impression that it’s both normal and acceptable to look at someone who isn’t your wife if it makes you happy. Whatever brings happiness and satisfaction is seen as being the goal. Is that really what normal is supposed to be?
Divorce rates in the church are at a high, and the rate is considered to be as high among professing Christians as among those who do not profess to be Christians. With there being virtually no difference in this area, it seems it would be a fair assessment to say the church has on a fairly large magnitude simply adopted the culture’s values in this area. Rather than influencing the culture, Christians have been influenced by the culture. Respect for one another deteriorates so that abuses happen, commitment is lost, and marriage partners begin to be viewed as parasites on the body rather than truly one body, one flesh. Discontentment lies around every corner and thoughts of fleeing to a better option are entertained as legitimate possibilities. An “entertainment” view of love takes over in place of a devoted, sacrificial, caring love, so that when the honeymoon high wears off, the temptation creeps in to move on to another relationship so as to experience that honeymoon high again. Love becomes reduced to just that high feeling, so that when the high is gone then love is said to be gone too. If this is the lie we are believing, then is it any wonder that disrespect, pleasure-seeking, and lack of commitment have become the norms in our society?
A common thread in all four examples seems to be “fun”. Our culture seems to have accepted the belief that the pursuit of happiness is supreme, and as long as the goal is to have fun, then it doesn’t matter what happens along the way. We seem to have forgotten to live for anything more than the present and however the present feels. The past’s mistakes are not learned from, and the future is disregarded as irrelevant.
Thus actually wanting a relationship of mutual involvement in each others’ lives often takes a back seat to the fun, thrills, and feelings. Outgoing, charismatic, fun, thrill-seeking people -- the kind you see in movies -- become hot commodities. But when the fun wears off, gone too is the desire to continue, and a breakup or divorce becomes the next step.
What has happened to the aspect of commitment and active involvement in each other? A few theories exist as a response. One is that social pressures to date at an early age (especially in high school culture) require a fast decision for the sole purpose of landing someone so as to be able to change status on Facebook and go to the prom. The other person isn’t as important as having ones own status among peers emphasized. Being in a relationship is essentially required to avoid being an outcast. Another theory is related to the high school theory but affects adults -- in some situations and social circles, a single person is seen as less legitimate than a married person. A single person may feel the need to make a quick decision and enter a relationship with the intent of marriage so as to be in a better position to make advancements on the social ladder. Their union is not based on each other as much as it’s based on getting ahead of everyone else in the world. When things get tough, there may not be enough there to hold them together. Yet another theory involves the entertainment factor: books, music, and movies paint an attractive picture of a particular ideal, and decisions are made based on those ideals -- ideals which often are as shallow as looks and material goods. If shallow to begin with, when the material goods are gone and the looks change, there may be little else to keep the relationship alive. These are but some of the possible reasons why, as the value of each individual has been cheapened, breakups and divorce rates remain at a high rate.
PART TWO: FINDING WHAT’S RIGHT
I think if a survey were to be taken of what people want in a relationship or a marriage, a high number of responses would include some allusion to a “fairy tale”. Certainly we could expect a significant number of such responses among the female demographic, but I think a high amount of guys would admit to the same. What is it about the “fairy tale” that appeals to so many?
Perhaps it’s the “happily ever after” component. In an age where, on average, five out of ten marriages will be dissolved, the picture of a commitment that lasts for life is a very desirable alternative, even if it may seem unreal today. In a depraved and fallen world, this picture of what’s right still appeals to many of us.
Or perhaps it’s how everything seems to fall together just right... the worst predicaments end up being just what was needed to get two people to meet each other and fall in love. I’ll get back to this later, but this is also a truth -- even if we can’t see it at the time -- because this also reflects God’s sovereignty. We can rest assured that his plan will be worked out because he is in control.
Another aspect common to many romantic fairy tales is the great deal of respect each individual has for each other. You don’t hear people in fairy tales talking about “clubbing with their ‘b*tch’” or “losing a [dud] guy in ten days”. Instead we see classic chivalry, courteous behavior from a deference and respect for one another (sometimes almost to an extreme where the guys are overly strong and the gals are overly needy, but still in a healthy way). This, too, appeals to us because it fills a void that we know we rarely ever see around us. Even someone who has not been regenerated and made aware of the truth still often expresses this longing for something better as a result of common grace.
All too often, however, even this classic depiction becomes tainted by depravity and deception. What appeals to us ceases to be the pictures of truth -- the way it should be in the created order -- and instead becomes the surface things. Looks, appeal, and actions replace commitment, sovereign order, and sacrificial devotion. Before long, these become the main things we think about in fairy tale stories. Guys often forget the examples given of being a strong man to defend, protect, and sacrifice for the lady and instead just want to get her and be with her. Ladies often forget that the prince is a prince because he is the king’s son and is reflecting the character of his father and the mission he has been sent on (think about that!) and not the prince because he’s enjoyable to look at. The looks and charm become what’s remembered and focused on, (so that it can be easy to instead fall for an impostor who has the looks but isn’t the right one) rather than the prince’s character, commitment, and dedication to doing what he needs to do as a heir and representative of his father’s kingdom.
PART THREE: WHERE TO GO FROM HERE
Where things get harder is when it comes to putting ideas, illustrations, and proven truths into actual practice. Relationships and marriage aren’t things you can create 1-2-3 step programs for. You can’t scientifically measure it and then create formulas for getting the desired results. You can’t even follow certain principles and get people to respond in a certain way (listen up and get rid of the books that supposedly help). In fact, sometimes you just have to step out, take a risk, and be willing to accept what happens -- always remaining true to your convictions, keeping a level head, and seeking God’s will. A potential pitfall is when something starts to seem to be not right and due to pressure -- whether social, emotional, etc. -- these concerns are suppressed.
But what if concerns are suppressed and someone still proceeds into a painful situation that seems to have been a wrong choice? Is it then too late? Has God’s plan been destroyed? First, if we really believe in God’s sovereignty, we have to also agree that God’s plan can not be ruined. What we do is still known by him and while we can cause unnecessary pain to ourselves and others, we can’t foil his intentions. If we could, then who would really be the sovereign one?! So it’s hard for me to really say with certainty that a wrong choice has really caused a major, life-altering problem. Certainly, God does not will for us to sin. If we make a sinful choice, we have definitely violated God’s decree. But when we get into a painful situation and seem to be sidetracked from where we should be, it may be that this situation was still really part of God’s design because it provided a necessary experience to help the individual grow. The hurt provided a learning experience that points to the direction to something better, or perhaps to give an insight that will be used to build up another person.
It would be a lot easier if we could just protect ourselves and those around us from anything that causes any hurt. In many homeschooling and family-centric organizations, parent-orchestrated courtship (basically betrothal, and pretty close to arranged marriages) are presented as the only way to go. In a “father knows best” sort of situation, anyone unmarried (whether 18 or 38 years old) must yield to the parents‘ desires and let them approve and in some cases even establish the relationship; where without approval it can’t happen at all. How do I know this? I used to believe it and live surrounded by it. One of the main reasons is to protect others from making the same mistakes and experiencing the same things they themselves have. We often think that if we’ve had something unpleasant happen, we have learned from it and then can prevent others from doing the same thing so that they don’t go through it at all. But as noble as it sounds -- and while I detest the legalistic rules that comes from these viewpoints and the completely unnatural, contrived and regulated approach to relationships that these groups present -- I can see where they’re coming from, and the intent really is for a good reason. The intent doesn’t justify the means or the end, but we can still see where it comes from. When it does really get out of hand and the intent as well isn’t all that noble is when it’s orchestrated simply as a means of control -- not for protection -- such as for executing a “vision-casted” two hundred year plan, or a means of trying to control what one’s children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, etc. will accomplish in order to see one’s own goals come true. However, I’ll avoid going further into criticism of this as it would distract from the intent of this particular post.
Back on the main topic, it’s only by trusting in God’s will -- that unpleasant things are part of a better plan and something greater that hasn’t yet been made clear -- that we can still be content even in disappointment. His plan didn’t just get thwarted by some wrong choice or dumb decision. Our goal did, but if it wasn’t the right goal it needed to be terminated anyway.
Finally, what are some things we can do in order to remain focused on the truth in the face of the distortion, deception, and perversion our culture throws at us?
The first thing I would suggest to the reader is to ensure you know what you believe as far as right and wrong, make sure that it is a sound view in line with the Bible, and do not give in to letting your guard down. When something is wrong, don’t continue even if all the social pressure around you is screaming in your ear to give in. The saying is true that “what is popular is not always right; what is right is not always popular.”
Second, if you are looking for a long-term committed relationship -- a good goal, as an intention of something short-term has already resulted in commitment being thrown to the wind -- think through ramifications and what things are requirements for the person you are considering a relationship with. A few years ago, singer-songwriter Derek Webb would often sing the song “Dance”, which he had written earlier during his time with Caedmon’s Call. The song was written about his grandmother, who at past 90 years old had been proposed to by a good friend of hers who was a resident in the same nursing home. However, she was quick to say she turned him down right away... because he couldn’t dance! Derek Webb would go on to explain at the concerts that “for all you young ladies out there”, this was a good reason to have a list of non-optionals and turn away any guy that didn’t meet the list! Now I’d add a couple things to this humorous illustration. First, it’s not just for women but applies to guys as well. Second, dancing probably isn’t really a good non-optional unless dancing is central to your calling so that having a partner who couldn’t dance would really be too much of a point of contention. But to be serious about this, it really is good advice. Some thoughts to consider...
1. Know your calling! If you are called to do something or be something, and another person simply does not share that same value (or is even opposed to it), there’s a good chance this relationship would be a bad idea. Though it’s certainly possible that God will bring the other person around so they share the same goal, it’s at least a cause for concern. The difference in goals can at minimum become a point of contention, and potentially become so great that you might be tempted to throw aside the goal for the sake of peace and unity. For example, if you are called to serve people, then someone who doesn’t particularly like people isn’t a good fit. If you’re passionate about missions, then someone who doesn’t appreciate any culture but his or her own isn’t a good fit.
2. Decide which things you simply cannot compromise without violating your conscience and beliefs. For Christians, theology can and should be a big one. If you aren’t on the same page in what you believe, what is going to happen when you must make a decision based on what you believe the Bible teaches? For example, when you have kids, what happens if you are in disagreement on whether to baptize your children into the covenant fellowship or have them remain as an outsider until they have their own profession of faith? Denominational differences -- ways people interpret Scripture -- really can be a bigger deal than most will readily admit.
3. See the whole person. Usually when people talk about non-optional goals for a relationship, it focuses on things like charisma, appeal, looks, common interests, etc. But what about character? Someone who you can have great discussions with, enjoy being around, etc. but has no sense of commitment so might leave (emotionally or actually) as soon as someone more exciting becomes available simply isn’t a good fit. You can certainly remain friends, but I would be extremely cautious about ever pursuing a deeper relationship with that person unless they undergo some serious changes. And unless that other person does undergo some serious changes, they may never want to even be around you again -- even just to be friends -- because of the entertainment-values-based thrill-seeking nature. (Little known fact: I know this from experience.) Or someone who is “good on the eyes” might meet everything on an “externals checklist” (something I really don’t recommend) but actually share few common interests, have different goals, and simply not be compatible. So to want a relationship with someone just based on their physical appearance really is to also invite disaster. To shun someone just because they don’t match up in the appearance department is also not right. This deception may be one of the biggest lies of our culture that we unknowingly believe and use as a filter. So much for the Hollywood ideal!
At the same time, realize that God isn't done working on any of us -- and in time, flaws that are roadblocks now may be things of the past later on.
Third, consider which influences may be detrimental due to unwholesome ideas being presented as the right thing. Forms of entertainment which cause unrealistic or unhealthy expectations, stir up feelings of discontent, make light of inappropriate behavior, etc. should be avoided. Some general advice that is “80% right 70% of the time for 60% of the population” (just kidding; I think it really is a good thing to keep in mind) is to engage culture when truth is present or when your involvement can be used to change the culture for good. Avoid involvement with the culture in areas where you can make no difference but it can change you. This will vary for each person, but if you being to be shaped by it rather than shaping it yourself, it may become a serious problem.
Fourth and finally, remember that no amount of scientific modeling, prescribing, or planning will guarantee a particular result. You can’t put God in a box, and neither can you try to make him direct in a certain way. His leading may be a huge surprise, but when he is ready to reveal it, he will do so. Then you can look back at the past and see how all the different twists and turns and roadblocks actually did serve a purpose and weren’t for no reason at all. Then give God the glory for what he has done.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Recap of Service Project in Walthill, NE
This is a modified version of a note I put up on Facebook today highlighting last week's project in Walthill, NE with Mission to the World.
THE TEAMS:
6 from Omaha, 5 from Lincoln, 3 from Grand Island... plus a couple more from Lincoln that came up for a day or two... plus MTW staff from Missouri and Georgia.
Recap:
Huge blessing working with the teams we had this year, all from Nebraska PCA churches. Everyone worked well together and came together as one big team. This is the first year we’ve really had that happen to the degree that it did this year. Having unity among the team members allowed us to really focus on the service projects and VBS due to not having to be concerned about also working things out among ourselves.
THE SERVICE PROJECTS:
The main project this year was renovating the third floor of the Picotte Center in Walthill. The Picotte Center, built in 1912, was formerly the hospital started and operated by Susan LaFlesche Picotte, the first female Native American doctor (in “modern” medicine). Two years ago we did quite a bit of work on the exterior of the building, as well as drywall repair in the basement. As seen in the photos, the third floor was really transformed by the end of the week. Other projects involved repairing a retaining wall adjacent to a basement (and actually under a deck that a team had painted last year!), and fixing a gutter that hadn’t been properly repaired by another group in the past.
Recap:
On Monday morning we started chipping away at the loose, old paint on the walls of the third floor rooms. We had a huge task ahead due to the paint being in terrible condition and everything covered in decades-old dust, but the teams got to work and by the end of even the first day had made significant progress on scraping away the loose paint and preparing for wall repair and then primer.
Tuesday’s project left the walls looking a whole lot better. It was on this day that we saw the biggest transformation, as the cracks had been patched and with a coat of primer the walls actually looked pretty much white!
On Wednesday we began the finish coat of painting, as well as repairing and texturing the ceilings. Huge improvements! Some also worked outdoors on painting a wooden lattice outside the basement. Early in the week a few also worked on some landscaping -- weeding and planting flowers.
Thursday consisted primarily of floor cleaning, scraping up paint that had dripped as well as old paint that was stuck on the floor from paint jobs many years ago. The dust was still so thick that when we got the floors damp to scrub and clean, the dust turned into a slimy mud that was almost like an outdoor project! On Thursday, as the work at the Picotte Center started to wind down, some team members left to work on the retaining wall as well as a gutter repair job that we’d been notified about by one of the people working at the Picotte Center, now used to house an organization that works with youth.
The work was finished in good time on Friday morning. It was amazing to contrast the finished project Friday with the photos we’d taken during orientation Sunday afternoon! It had been pretty hard work, especially with all the cleaning involved, but seeing the completed job was rewarding.
VBS IN THE PARK:
Monday through Friday in the afternoons from 2:30 to 4:00 we conducted a Vacation Bible School in the city park and American Legion building. We had 14 kids both of the first two days, and then around 8-9 kids the next three days, ranging from about age 3 to 13. Monday through Thursday some of us also played basketball with local kids on a nearby basketball court. I’m pretty sure us out-of-shape and mostly-out-of-practice white guys actually won more often than we lost -- which is saying something as the local kids were really good and competitive!
Recap:
The team from Lincoln organized VBS this year, providing the curriculum and music. The songs chosen were primarily VBS/children’s songs from a couple decades ago, but with a little practice we had the songs brought back to recollection. They included “I Just Wanna Be A Sheep”, “Who’s the King of the Jungle”, “Praise Ye The Lord”, a newer song - “Every Move I Make” (a very popular hit with our church youth here in Omaha), and a couple more that I can’t remember right now while typing this up! Each day was organized into a theme for the day -- the “Main Idea, WHOAA!” -- and a memory verse. Snacks and crafts were also chosen to integrate with the topic. The time with the kids would conclude each day with an active game. Having played basketball Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, I didn’t see a lot of the VBS events this year, but from what I have heard -- and what I saw Tuesday and Friday -- it went well.
THE KIDS:
This year was a mixed bag working with the kids. We still haven’t seen the same numbers the last two years as the first year, when a couple times around thirty kids came. That first year we really got to know a lot of the local kids, learning their names and a little about them, and seeing some of them make professions of faith. Still, it’s been good to see a few of them back the next couple of years, and for the most part we had a good group of kids -- definitely on the rowdy side, but still a good group -- this year.
This year as we started to find out more about the stories of some of the kids -- and how in many cases the parents simply aren’t around, or aren’t sober, to be there for their kids and the kids end up growing up having to fend for themselves and learn life lessons without a strong family influence -- we’ve decided we really want to be able to help in whatever limited way possible. Sometimes that’s just taking some time to go and be there -- even for part of a day -- to let them know there’s still people who care. I remember in the first year there was a little girl, maybe six or seven years old, who said she couldn’t think of the idea of God as a father because if God were her father then he would probably beat her. This is the kind of stuff some of these kids grow up knowing nothing different from!
Some information has been cut from this public version due to its sensitive nature.
DAY TO DAY STUFF:
Each morning started for the group somewhere between 6 and 7 AM, when the breakfast crew would rise first to begin preparing the meal, followed by the early risers and the coffee-seeking crowd. Breakfast would conclude by 7:30 AM and teams would then prepare to leave for the work site by 8:00.
As with previous years we had lunch and dinner at the Senior Center about a block away -- generous portions of good rural Nebraska-style cooking! Each evening after VBS was finished we had “gang showers” up at the school -- no one’s favorite thing but a necessity nonetheless. Some of the evenings we also had special speakers: on Monday, a college professor from Blair, NE (native Omaha) spoke on overcoming misconceptions about the native people. On Wednesday, we had a Christian speaker talking about how she was adopted as a little girl, raised in white culture, and her return to the Omaha and Winnebago people. On Thursday, a tribal police officer spoke about his history as well as elements of the native religion. And on Friday, we watched a documentary about the legal challenges to the problems in Whiteclay, NE just south of the Lakota reservation -- especially the severe toll that substance addictions are taking on the Lakota reservation. Though not dealing specifically with the Omaha reservation, we could clearly see some parallels and how the similar problem also is devastating the Omaha culture.
Later in the evenings we also met for large group worship -- a debriefing, singing time, prayer time, and message -- followed by small group time, where each church group would meet to talk more specifically about the day, individual highlights and needs, and our small group focus devotional.
What down time was available between projects or evening activities was usually spent either looking for wireless Internet signals, processing photos, playing cards, debating theology, or reading. I also had some client work projects that I had to get done to stay on schedule on a few of the earlier days of the trip. There wasn’t a lot of free time available but it seemed like there was enough so that most people were able to not get overly stressed or tired.
Toward the end of the week plumbing problems resurfaced in the church... similar problem as happened the past year... resulting in all restroom activity having to be in the Senior Center a block away. Fortunately that was just for the last evening and morning... and also fortunately there are no photos of the backup in the church basement! As if anyone really wanted to hear about, see, or remember that! So moving on...
INTERACTION AND CONCERNS:
In addition to the already-stated concerns about the needs of the local kids, we also saw the effects of depression and addiction on the community. Broken families almost seemed to be the norm rather than the exception. Kids roam the streets late into the night because parents aren’t home. We’d only been in Walthill for a couple hours on Saturday when the first intoxicated man came over to the church seeking counsel and/or help. On Thursday a friend (or relative?) of his also came over, having been referred by the first man. There was also a guy that I talked to for a minute or two outside the church about our work in town in answer to his more direct request to get inside. The saddest thing, though, was to see a man who two years ago had come to the door late on the Tuesday night and who we’d worked with quite a bit that week... and then who last year had been doing great and worked along side us on projects... struggling again, family life on the ropes, spending most of the waking hours of the day intoxicated and again knocking on the church door late at night, coming in sick and intoxicated, and seeming to be stuck in a never-ending cycle of promising to do better and then getting drunk again and not being able to be around his family.
FINAL THOUGHTS:
On Monday night, our guest speaker (the college professor who teaches in Blair) reminded us that while the societal ills are so visible on the reservation, we shouldn’t think that just because we don’t seem to have them around us they don’t exist. We need to remember to not think we have it all together where we live and that the problems are just “out there” somewhere, or that we can go to the reservation to see brokenness but we’re all healthy in our urban neighborhoods.
The thing is that on the reservation it just tends to be more visible. Nonetheless it’s all around us, and in many cases is directly affecting us. But we tend to do a really good job of masking it. For example, how do we usually respond when someone asks the simple -- but actually very deep -- question of “how are you?” Usually it’s something like “good, and you?” -- basically no different than a casual “hello”. But are we really being truthful at those times? Are we really doing “good” when we come to group settings with nice, happy, smiling faces as if we didn’t have a care in the world... but when we leave the group setting we’re back to family strife, broken relationships, deceit, uncertainty, tension, and a whole bunch of other things we’d love to run from because we can’t fix? The fact is we’re really a broken people too. Reminders of the curse of the fall surround us. (Incidentally, the very presence of the snake and a typical human reaction to it is but one example that should always serve as a reminder!) But what is the cure to the curse? The solution isn’t in looking better by fixing the facade. The fix isn’t in curbing bad behavior and just choosing good behavior. The solution is only found in Christ’s completed work. Not in our works helped along by His, but in His completed work. Only Christ has the power to reverse the curse. Only when he makes all things new will the curse be reversed. And only in his power and by his grace can our brokenness be healed. We sure don’t have the solution. This is what our communities need, both here and elsewhere -- not lots of good works and striving to fix something far beyond our control -- but instead total transformation; the spreading of the Kingdom not only throughout all aspects of our lives but throughout our communities, our regions, even to the whole world!
THE TEAMS:
6 from Omaha, 5 from Lincoln, 3 from Grand Island... plus a couple more from Lincoln that came up for a day or two... plus MTW staff from Missouri and Georgia.
Recap:
Huge blessing working with the teams we had this year, all from Nebraska PCA churches. Everyone worked well together and came together as one big team. This is the first year we’ve really had that happen to the degree that it did this year. Having unity among the team members allowed us to really focus on the service projects and VBS due to not having to be concerned about also working things out among ourselves.
THE SERVICE PROJECTS:
The main project this year was renovating the third floor of the Picotte Center in Walthill. The Picotte Center, built in 1912, was formerly the hospital started and operated by Susan LaFlesche Picotte, the first female Native American doctor (in “modern” medicine). Two years ago we did quite a bit of work on the exterior of the building, as well as drywall repair in the basement. As seen in the photos, the third floor was really transformed by the end of the week. Other projects involved repairing a retaining wall adjacent to a basement (and actually under a deck that a team had painted last year!), and fixing a gutter that hadn’t been properly repaired by another group in the past.
Recap:
On Monday morning we started chipping away at the loose, old paint on the walls of the third floor rooms. We had a huge task ahead due to the paint being in terrible condition and everything covered in decades-old dust, but the teams got to work and by the end of even the first day had made significant progress on scraping away the loose paint and preparing for wall repair and then primer.
Tuesday’s project left the walls looking a whole lot better. It was on this day that we saw the biggest transformation, as the cracks had been patched and with a coat of primer the walls actually looked pretty much white!
On Wednesday we began the finish coat of painting, as well as repairing and texturing the ceilings. Huge improvements! Some also worked outdoors on painting a wooden lattice outside the basement. Early in the week a few also worked on some landscaping -- weeding and planting flowers.
Thursday consisted primarily of floor cleaning, scraping up paint that had dripped as well as old paint that was stuck on the floor from paint jobs many years ago. The dust was still so thick that when we got the floors damp to scrub and clean, the dust turned into a slimy mud that was almost like an outdoor project! On Thursday, as the work at the Picotte Center started to wind down, some team members left to work on the retaining wall as well as a gutter repair job that we’d been notified about by one of the people working at the Picotte Center, now used to house an organization that works with youth.
The work was finished in good time on Friday morning. It was amazing to contrast the finished project Friday with the photos we’d taken during orientation Sunday afternoon! It had been pretty hard work, especially with all the cleaning involved, but seeing the completed job was rewarding.
VBS IN THE PARK:
Monday through Friday in the afternoons from 2:30 to 4:00 we conducted a Vacation Bible School in the city park and American Legion building. We had 14 kids both of the first two days, and then around 8-9 kids the next three days, ranging from about age 3 to 13. Monday through Thursday some of us also played basketball with local kids on a nearby basketball court. I’m pretty sure us out-of-shape and mostly-out-of-practice white guys actually won more often than we lost -- which is saying something as the local kids were really good and competitive!
Recap:
The team from Lincoln organized VBS this year, providing the curriculum and music. The songs chosen were primarily VBS/children’s songs from a couple decades ago, but with a little practice we had the songs brought back to recollection. They included “I Just Wanna Be A Sheep”, “Who’s the King of the Jungle”, “Praise Ye The Lord”, a newer song - “Every Move I Make” (a very popular hit with our church youth here in Omaha), and a couple more that I can’t remember right now while typing this up! Each day was organized into a theme for the day -- the “Main Idea, WHOAA!” -- and a memory verse. Snacks and crafts were also chosen to integrate with the topic. The time with the kids would conclude each day with an active game. Having played basketball Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, I didn’t see a lot of the VBS events this year, but from what I have heard -- and what I saw Tuesday and Friday -- it went well.
THE KIDS:
This year was a mixed bag working with the kids. We still haven’t seen the same numbers the last two years as the first year, when a couple times around thirty kids came. That first year we really got to know a lot of the local kids, learning their names and a little about them, and seeing some of them make professions of faith. Still, it’s been good to see a few of them back the next couple of years, and for the most part we had a good group of kids -- definitely on the rowdy side, but still a good group -- this year.
This year as we started to find out more about the stories of some of the kids -- and how in many cases the parents simply aren’t around, or aren’t sober, to be there for their kids and the kids end up growing up having to fend for themselves and learn life lessons without a strong family influence -- we’ve decided we really want to be able to help in whatever limited way possible. Sometimes that’s just taking some time to go and be there -- even for part of a day -- to let them know there’s still people who care. I remember in the first year there was a little girl, maybe six or seven years old, who said she couldn’t think of the idea of God as a father because if God were her father then he would probably beat her. This is the kind of stuff some of these kids grow up knowing nothing different from!
Some information has been cut from this public version due to its sensitive nature.
DAY TO DAY STUFF:
Each morning started for the group somewhere between 6 and 7 AM, when the breakfast crew would rise first to begin preparing the meal, followed by the early risers and the coffee-seeking crowd. Breakfast would conclude by 7:30 AM and teams would then prepare to leave for the work site by 8:00.
As with previous years we had lunch and dinner at the Senior Center about a block away -- generous portions of good rural Nebraska-style cooking! Each evening after VBS was finished we had “gang showers” up at the school -- no one’s favorite thing but a necessity nonetheless. Some of the evenings we also had special speakers: on Monday, a college professor from Blair, NE (native Omaha) spoke on overcoming misconceptions about the native people. On Wednesday, we had a Christian speaker talking about how she was adopted as a little girl, raised in white culture, and her return to the Omaha and Winnebago people. On Thursday, a tribal police officer spoke about his history as well as elements of the native religion. And on Friday, we watched a documentary about the legal challenges to the problems in Whiteclay, NE just south of the Lakota reservation -- especially the severe toll that substance addictions are taking on the Lakota reservation. Though not dealing specifically with the Omaha reservation, we could clearly see some parallels and how the similar problem also is devastating the Omaha culture.
Later in the evenings we also met for large group worship -- a debriefing, singing time, prayer time, and message -- followed by small group time, where each church group would meet to talk more specifically about the day, individual highlights and needs, and our small group focus devotional.
What down time was available between projects or evening activities was usually spent either looking for wireless Internet signals, processing photos, playing cards, debating theology, or reading. I also had some client work projects that I had to get done to stay on schedule on a few of the earlier days of the trip. There wasn’t a lot of free time available but it seemed like there was enough so that most people were able to not get overly stressed or tired.
Toward the end of the week plumbing problems resurfaced in the church... similar problem as happened the past year... resulting in all restroom activity having to be in the Senior Center a block away. Fortunately that was just for the last evening and morning... and also fortunately there are no photos of the backup in the church basement! As if anyone really wanted to hear about, see, or remember that! So moving on...
INTERACTION AND CONCERNS:
In addition to the already-stated concerns about the needs of the local kids, we also saw the effects of depression and addiction on the community. Broken families almost seemed to be the norm rather than the exception. Kids roam the streets late into the night because parents aren’t home. We’d only been in Walthill for a couple hours on Saturday when the first intoxicated man came over to the church seeking counsel and/or help. On Thursday a friend (or relative?) of his also came over, having been referred by the first man. There was also a guy that I talked to for a minute or two outside the church about our work in town in answer to his more direct request to get inside. The saddest thing, though, was to see a man who two years ago had come to the door late on the Tuesday night and who we’d worked with quite a bit that week... and then who last year had been doing great and worked along side us on projects... struggling again, family life on the ropes, spending most of the waking hours of the day intoxicated and again knocking on the church door late at night, coming in sick and intoxicated, and seeming to be stuck in a never-ending cycle of promising to do better and then getting drunk again and not being able to be around his family.
FINAL THOUGHTS:
On Monday night, our guest speaker (the college professor who teaches in Blair) reminded us that while the societal ills are so visible on the reservation, we shouldn’t think that just because we don’t seem to have them around us they don’t exist. We need to remember to not think we have it all together where we live and that the problems are just “out there” somewhere, or that we can go to the reservation to see brokenness but we’re all healthy in our urban neighborhoods.
The thing is that on the reservation it just tends to be more visible. Nonetheless it’s all around us, and in many cases is directly affecting us. But we tend to do a really good job of masking it. For example, how do we usually respond when someone asks the simple -- but actually very deep -- question of “how are you?” Usually it’s something like “good, and you?” -- basically no different than a casual “hello”. But are we really being truthful at those times? Are we really doing “good” when we come to group settings with nice, happy, smiling faces as if we didn’t have a care in the world... but when we leave the group setting we’re back to family strife, broken relationships, deceit, uncertainty, tension, and a whole bunch of other things we’d love to run from because we can’t fix? The fact is we’re really a broken people too. Reminders of the curse of the fall surround us. (Incidentally, the very presence of the snake and a typical human reaction to it is but one example that should always serve as a reminder!) But what is the cure to the curse? The solution isn’t in looking better by fixing the facade. The fix isn’t in curbing bad behavior and just choosing good behavior. The solution is only found in Christ’s completed work. Not in our works helped along by His, but in His completed work. Only Christ has the power to reverse the curse. Only when he makes all things new will the curse be reversed. And only in his power and by his grace can our brokenness be healed. We sure don’t have the solution. This is what our communities need, both here and elsewhere -- not lots of good works and striving to fix something far beyond our control -- but instead total transformation; the spreading of the Kingdom not only throughout all aspects of our lives but throughout our communities, our regions, even to the whole world!
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